The History of Valentine's Day

(*Excerpt from History.com)
"Every February, across the country, candy, flowers, and gifts are exchanged between loved ones, all in the name of St. Valentine. But who is this mysterious saint and why do we celebrate this holiday? The history of Valentine's Day -- and its patron saint -- is shrouded in mystery. But we do know that February has long been a month of romance. St. Valentine's Day, as we know it today, contains vestiges of both Christian and ancient Roman tradition. So, who was Saint Valentine and how did he become associated with this ancient rite? Today, the Catholic Church recognizes at least three different saints named Valentine or Valentinus, all of whom were martyred.
"One legend contends that Valentine was a priest who served during the third century in Rome. When Emperor Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers than those with wives and families, he outlawed marriage for young men -- his crop of potential soldiers. Valentine, realizing the injustice of the decree, defied Claudius and continued to perform marriages for young lovers in secret. When Valentine's actions were discovered, Claudius ordered that he be put to death.
"Other stories suggest that Valentine may have been killed for attempting to help Christians escape harsh Roman prisons where they were often beaten and tortured.
"According to one legend, Valentine actually sent the first 'valentine' greeting himself. While in prison, it is believed that Valentine fell in love with a young girl -- who may have been his jailor's daughter -- who visited him during his confinement. Before his death, it is alleged that he wrote her a letter, which he signed 'From your Valentine,' an expression that is still in use today. Although the truth behind the Valentine legends is murky, the stories certainly emphasize his appeal as a sympathetic, heroic, and, most importantly, romantic figure. It's no surprise that by the Middle Ages, Valentine was one of the most popular saints in England and France."



Halmark sure makes a killing on all the suckers out there silly enough to think a card, a box of chocolates, or a silly stuffed teddy bear are the "symbols" of one's true affection. If you want to know how much someone loves you, all you have to do is look into their eyes when they say so. All you need to know is right there in front of you.

The simple acknowledgement that yes, you are the love of their life and you mean the world to them should be enough to sate anyone's appetite for love and romance. So, why is it that so many people put such great emphasis on comparing one's love to how big your Valentine card is, how nice your dinner was, or how sweet and romantic your loved one was on this special day?

Does this mean they love you more on this one day than they do on any other? Or is it a day set aside for romance as a special "Please let me show you just how much I love you" day? How are you treated on the other 364 days of the year? If you are treated any less, does it mean they only love you one day a year? Or do they think you only need one day a year to know exactly how they feel?

Only 10% of all language is actually spoken. The other 90% is actions, body language, and gestures we all come to know intimately from our loved ones. Therin lies the true affection that is your due.

The card, chocolates, and stuffed teddy bear are also nice.

Happy Valentine's Day

One of the most horrible feelings a mother can have is when she finds out her child did something unthinkable. Sure, the Terrorist is only six years old, but most mothers think their children are perfect and when something happens to prove that their child is normal it's a shocker.

I have to admit I am a more lienient mother than my mother was to me. My mother........ hmmmm, too much information, and not enough therapy to get into it at this point. Let's just say I am not about to make the same mistakes she made, although I'm sure to make plenty of my own original mistakes along the way.

I found out yesterday the little munchkin got caught cheating on her spelling test! Now (s)he who has NEVER cheated on a test EVER please feel free to throw the first stone. I am not at that point in the mother child relationship where I can tell her those things. She is still quite young and impressionable. If she thinks everyone has cheated on a test at one point or another, she'll think it isn't as bad as all that. However, back to the thinking your child is perfect, it stunned me to find out she could do something so normal (albeit not nice, but normal none the less).

I put my kid up on a pedestal and expect the best from her. I wonder if I'm becomming the complete opposite of my mother? I did not know how to deal with her transgression so the iron fist came down. She got into her P.J.'s, did her homework, ate supper, took a bath, and went straight to bed. Same thing tonite too. And she's okay with it!! She knows she did something wrong and that it has to be dealt with. To top it off, I lost my cool after supper and yelled at her! I mean YELLED at her, to get in the tub. She jumped right away and said "okay Mom". And to top off the guilt trip that I'm having, she appologizes to me and as I'm folding clothes in my room feeling totally sorry for myself, she calls out; "Mom? I love you!".

Ugh!

And now I am even more horrified. How could I be such a mean mother? Where did I go wrong that my "perfect" (ha, ha, ha, ha, ha ~sniff~, ha, ha!) kid could cheat on a test? And at six. What will she do at ten? I hate punishing my kid. She is the sweetest thing I have ever laid eyes on and I feel like a big meanie. Now, I'm not so naieve as to really think she's perfect (she is the Terrorist after all), but I took this as a blow to my own mothering skills, not as a flaw in her personality. I wonder if that would be considered selfish?

I hate to admit it, but my child is more like me than I feel comfortable with. She never stops talking, even when she has nothing to say, and she's very bossy. Too mature for six. All things considered though, she is the greatest treasure in my life and I am hopeful she will not have to go through some of the hard lessons in life that I went through.

And for anyone reading this, no, I'm not a horrible person. Just a normal person with horrible self-esteem issues when it comes to being a good mom.

~sigh~

Misunderstandings can hurt people, and not just the ones who are misunderstood. When I have issues, I try my hardest to deal with them and the people involved without hurting anyones feelings (intentionally). I even appologize for things I didn't do simply because I feel it is somehow MY fault I was misunderstood in the first place. However, through no fault of my own, I was sorely misconstrued this week and it was a very hurtful thing to find out that someone I care so deeply for would think I would do something to harm them, their friends, or their reputation. I did not find out through normal means (I talk, you talk, we settle things) either, but by blog-stalking. I had no idea I was being considered at fault for something I didn't do, and had no chance to defend myself. It was an onslaught from unexpected sources and it simmered all day yesterday.

By the end of the day I was a wreck.

Thus, I was overwhelmed with the feelings of inadequacy as both a mother and a friend, when I had to deal with the Terrorists offence. No wonder I felt so bad. I feel like I have taken my hurtful feelings and put them onto her.

Things got cleared up and put away where they belong (back in the closet with you!!!!!!) and appologies made, (forgiveness given) but the anxiety from wondering all day What the hell did I do? remained and took some time to wear off. I tend to blow things out of perportion myself, to the extreme at times, so I cannot be angry. Hurt, yes, but not angry.

An excellent lesson from all this; the best way to avoid getting the wrong end of the stick is by looking at both ends and inspecting them carefully. They may both look alike, but in conclusion, only one extremity is the right one.

I'm no literary genius but........

As per blog stalking recomendations from Dent, I grabbed the nearest book within arms reach, turned to page 123, found the fifth sentence and copied the next four sentences. I'm a nurse and am at work at present, so quite often on night shift I bring my books to read on my down time. Thank God the Emergency Diagnosis and Treatment book was a little further away ~yawn~! This is much more entertaining:

1. The attack came just at dawn - always a vulnerable time for the camp - when the oxen were being hitched to the snow-sledge and the escort was saddling up their destriers.

2. The day was overcast, with a low heavy sky that hid the mountain peaks in the distance, and a fine powdery snow fell nearly straight down, for the wind had dropped just before dawn.

3. "Kellen!"

4. Shalkan's distant shout was the first warning he had.

And there you have my very first post, blog, soap-box topic etc.....